Friday, 1 January 2021

Squirrel proof bird feeder

Outsmart the Squirrels!

Finally I outsmarted my local squirrels - so far! See photo below.

I remember my father spending much self amusement time trying to invent a method to feed the birds but keep the squirrels away. He finally hung the bird feeder, a simple tray, from a branch close to our summer cottage, then strung a cord from it right through a wooden window frame into our living room! My mother was very patient. When the squirrel shimmied down onto the feeder he pulled the cord to spin the tray and the pesky rodent would fly off.

The trouble was it became a war in which the squirrel would get right back up there to try again. Either he found it entertaining like a kid on a roller coaster or he wanted in turn, to outsmart Dad!

There is a little rhyme about graffiti writers: "Man's ambition must be small to write his name on an outhouse (bathroom) wall!" I think it also applies to retired men like yours truly, pitting their brain against a squirrel's. 

This is a very simple design. You can buy a commercial metal one like an upside down funnel.  I made it 24 inches square and could have enlarged it but my first attempt works. It also catches a lot of the seed dropped, or rejected by the birds.

The little guys were at first irate when they saw birds like doves up there feasting away. They tried several times to jump from my gazebo onto it but it was too far away. They can climb the pole but can't lean back and out enough to grab the edge of the platform. Now they are content to retrieve the droppings. FYI, I do leave a pile on the ground just for them.

It is New Years Day 2021. Winter has been mild so far. When they get desperate they might succeed but so far I win.

By the way. This is the best design for such a deterrent in all of history. Only I could have done this. My generals and security advisors all failed. No other occupant of this house before me ever accomplished this. But I know you fake media types will never give me credit. That's OK. Media reporters are all squirrel brains. If the squirrels ever do succeed it will not be my fault nor will it be from Russian aid. It will be the Chinese for sure. Biden will never admit this. Neither would Obama.



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