Sunday, 18 March 2018

Is God a Woman or a Man?

A Very Old Question Still Very Taboo

According to the Bible and I suspect most holy books, God created woman from Adam’s ribs. Man’s ribs have never been the same.  Women make us laugh until our ribs hurt; cry until our ribs hurt; exert ourselves sexually until our ribs hurt (I wish); dissuade us from eating too many ribs; and they have been generally ribbing us ever since.
I think we are lucky that God (reputed to be male) created breasts to cover Eve’s ribs. You see He was probably going to create a third sex from Eve’s ribs; then a fourth from the third sex’s ribs, etc. How many sexes would we have had today? What a mess that would have caused. We can’t even handle two – OK some today would say the number of sexes or preferences is actually four or six or seven.
Thankfully, it never happened. I think He was distracted by His own creation - female breasts. One look and it was probably "Wow - I’ve really outdone myself this time. They’re not bad!  Now what was I about to do next? I don’t remember”. Hence there are only two 2 sexes. Breasts have always stupefied men, even great men. Oh yes – and yours truly.
Some argue that God is a woman. Most men can't decorate their way out of a paper bag let alone decorate an entire planet. It would explain the history of the earth - ice, stone, and modern ages; multiple races; varying climates; a full range of geography; the evolution of the species. God changed her mind – frequently of course!
Problem: If God were a woman and created man first, then every female thereafter would have disliked God. No, a woman would have created a woman first. The reverse doesn’t make sense. Of course when did a woman ever make any sen ... no, better not go there.
Different consideration: Many women have absolutely no use for men let alone give up a rib for them. It would be a unisex world - female only, if God were a woman and first created another woman. It is clearly not. Also, women would have no other sex to dump on in this case. Thus God would have really screwed up if she had created women only. We all know women NEVER screw up.
There you have it. God must be a man.
Don't get me wrong - I admire and envy women. However they do have a distinct advantage over most men - their partners are usually men (I can just hear the gasps and the cursing) - not always, but usually. I believe the world would be a better place if there were more women heads-of-state. There have been some great leaders who were women. They were tough when they had to be. I believe a woman is inclined to have a more humane nature than a man. Humane women can turn on their tough nature easier than tough men can turn on their tender nature. Consider this as well: If a female politician is caught in a covert sexually compromising situation she can run faster with her skirt up than a man can with his pants down! Also, with heels it is much more difficult to put her foot in her mouth.
Women brought order to life. They’ve been ordering us around ever since. My background is computer systems. There is no question in my mind that women are better at this - more logical and more organised, than most men. My spouse is more organised than I am - but then that is hardly a compliment. It is probably true that most households would be a shambles if men were in charge (even though we could find things faster). This was planned. Look at nature. Interesting isn't it? Most think that God is a man but assigned Mother Nature the task of looking after the physical world.
Behavioural differences between the sexes exist in most living creatures. Humans have developed some stereotyped roles for both sexes which can and should change but others are basic to nature. Surely there is no psychological conditioning in other species? The female lion was not "conditioned” by male chauvinist lions. The roving buck does not do battle with other bucks because he saw it on TV. Stallions don't jump fences to mount mares just to tell the boys about it over a few buckets of oats. These behaviours are in the genes.
I support 100 percent equality of opportunity; equal pay for equal work; eradication of sexual harassment (not simple flirtation) and of physical assault on women (and I guess men as well in some cases.) However I don’t see any need to expend any energy trying to make one sex more like the other. It would seem that having two different sexes with different characteristics has worked pretty well for millions of years for all living creatures.
Finally please don’t interpret this as my being anti-gay or anti-lesbian, or anti anything else to do with choice. All choices and feelings are increasingly accepted today as are complete sexual transitions. I just happen to be a heterosexual male and my experience in these matters has always involved females only.
My partner just read this before bed. Suddenly she has a headache. Hopefully she is just ribbing me.
Some things never change.
The Brewster

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